sunshine

the last few weeks, as we have been dealing with the shock of losing sadie and grieving, the weather here has been mirroring our emotions it seems.

as we left the hospital the night we went to the birth center and found out that our little sadie went to heaven, the fog was SO thick, we couldn't see very far in front of us at all, maybe 1oo feet at best as we drove home.

the days following, we had a bunch of gray cold days (for this time of year anyway!)...sometimes the sun would peak out for a little bit, shining it's rays down on us. sometimes we didn't always see it or feel it, but it was there.

today is full out sunny and warm.

my grieving started out foggy, thick and hard to see past...but there were glimmers of sunlight and hope sprinkled in. today's sunshine gives me a little picture of what's ahead...of what is to come.

what it boils down to is that my Jesus gives me hope.
He will continue to give me hope...TRUE hope...and what i need to get through each day...my manna. He is here. He is with me. He is holding me and i will seek Him and be held under His wing.

how i feel is different each day...sometimes each hour...but i have my glimmers of sunlight. i know i will have days of sunshine...AND i know i will have stormy days, gray and wet and hard. but i have hope knowing i will see the sun again. i have hope knowing that the Son is with me.

and someday, i will see my sadie again as we bask in the light of the Lord in heaven together.